Wednesday, December 31, 2008

I'm home

I'M HOME!
And it feels good.
It's been great visiting people, but now I'm ready to be home again :)

Saturday, December 27, 2008

New start needed

I've had lots of fun with family and food.
But now
I feel sluggish and sleepy and fat.
New Start here I come.

Wednesday, December 24, 2008

Nearly there...

Popping on quick.
I have a post to write about the Christmas tree, but I'm too tired to write it right now.
Just wanted to come and say "Happy Almost Christmas"

Tuesday, December 23, 2008

Christmas never comes easy in this household

There was the famous year that my Grandma forgot to buy onions, and had to send my Granddad and Uncle out on Christmas Eve to try to find some. There've been years when everyone comes down with some killer* bug or other. This year, it's the year of car trouble and illness.

I've been ill for a couple of days. Probably just a nasty cold, but it's still lingering. My Mum is now coming down with it too. HP may or may not follow in the next day or so. All this would be dealable with, I guess, but yesterday the oil light came on on my Mum's car, and didn't go out again.

The original plan involved HP and myself travelling to my Grandparents house today, and my parents following on tomorrow, but after ringing our garage and then the AA and then our garage again, the short version is that her car is not drivable, and needs to stay put over Christmas. So, I think, the plan is now that I will be driving my car to Grandma's today, along with HP, my Mum, and all the other stuff that we can possibly fit in it(!), and my Dad will follow tomorrow, on the coach. This could still all change, but that's how it stands for now. I better go and get on with packing then, I guess.

*killer may be a slight exaggeration

Monday, December 22, 2008

Ramblings

Last night I composed a beautiful blog post.

Unfortunately, since I was composing it while lying in bed, it will never actually be published.

Fortunately, since I was writing it under the influence of a high temperature and slight hallucinations, that's probably just as well.

Yep, I'm ill again. I think it's just a bad cold, but it's made me achey all over, very coughy, have a sore throat, a high temperature and other such exciting things.

I feel like haven't blogged much proper content in a while, but with my brain in this fuzzy state, I'm not sure any content I write will make sense. Instead I'll share with you a couple of quotable quotes from the past week.

"How can you sing it like you mean it, when it doesn't make any sense?" (HP on Alexandra singing Hallelujah)

"Awww, box. Happy box. Box cry" (Little Flower being entertained by an empty tissue box, in the absense of 'baby' - her dolly)

Friday, December 19, 2008

Today

We're in Cambridge, visiting Bekki and going to Oxfam for HP to try on wedding dresses.

Monday, December 15, 2008

Party Time!

(Edited to add: That's M, my boyfriend, and I at our church Christmas party on Saturday evening. Just so as you know!)

Saturday, December 13, 2008

Confidence in being me

(This post comes to you courtesy of the fact that Boo is still in BEDFORD, and is not yet in LONDON, where she's meant to be, so I'm in the library checking my emails while I wait for her to GET A MOVE ON!)

Tonight I'm going to a party. I'll be dressed up, in a dress(!) and I'm gonna have fun. Two years ago, the thought of wearing a dress would be something that would have made me uncomfortable, self-conscious, and I probably would have either worn a skirt and top, or my jeans, or just not felt like me if I really had to wear a dress.

Fast forward to now, and just the other day I went shopping with my boyfriend, and voluntarily tried on about 10 different dresses. I fell in love with a couple of them (the one I bought, and the 'spensive one in Monsoon). I've not only changed physically, but also mentally.

I like me. I know that I've written about that before on here, and I certainly hope I'm not boring anyone, but I still marvel at the fact that I like me, that I LOVE me. That I will be able to agree if someone tells me I look beautiful. That I feel beautiful. I guess what it all comes down to is, I have confidence in being me, and it feels good :)

Friday, December 12, 2008

better blog now,

cos the weekend is gonna be busy busy busy.

Tomorrow I will be going to the church prayer meeting, going for breakfast with friends, carol singing with church people outside Tesco, driving home, taking the tube into London to meet with Boo, coming home again, getting ready to go to a church posh-ed up party (sneak peek of what I'll be wearing here), going to the party, helping clear up after the party, coming home and collapsing in a big heap.

On Sunday I'll be going to church, and then probably having lunch out with someone, somewhere, and pretty much will probably be out for the whole day.

On Monday I will collapse in a big big heap, and also look after the kiddos. The end. Or is it the beginning?

Wednesday, December 10, 2008

Since it's all over the place

(flickr, facebook, my phone) I thought I'd post it here too.
Taken on Monday...

Monday, December 08, 2008

So, what do *I* believe?

I posted recently about having conversations with Jehovah's Witnesses who came to my door, and had several comments relating to that experience. (Along with all the comments about my boyfriend, I think that made that post the most commented on in quite a while!)

Someone called Edward (who I don't think I know in person, but I may be wrong. If you're still around it'd be great if you could tell me how you found my blog) asked me what I learnt from talking to the JWs and also said "You believed different things ... is that a good thing? Are you satisfied with that?", so I decided to post a little bit about what I do believe.

I believe that Jesus IS God. JWs believe that Jesus was created by God, and he then helped in the creation of the world. The JWs I was talking to also suggested that Jesus is the archangel Michael. It was the first time I've ever heard someone suggest that, but I very much disagree. I believe in the trinity, that God is God the Father, God the Son, and God the Holy Spirit.

I guess that's probably one of the fundamental differences between what I believe and what JWs believe, and it's also something that I refuse to change my mind on. (As an aside, I just spell-checked what I'd done so far, and I managed to mis-type the word 'believe' every single time I typed it in this post. I blame being tired!)

I think that JWs totally miss out on the point of grace. They seem to be intent on works to obtain salvation. They cite the great commission in Matthew 28, where Jesus commands his disciples to go out and make disciples of every nation as their reason for going knocking door to door, telling people about God. And I would totally agree with the reasoning behind their actions. However, I don't believe that my telling people about Jesus is my route to salvation. I believe that by believing in Jesus and repenting for my sins, I have salvation, because of what Jesus did when he died on the cross for me, to take away my sin.

I can't do anything to gain salvation. If I try to do it myself, I will always fall short of the perfect standard that God sets. If I try to work my way into heaven, I could work all day and all night, but still not obtain salvation. I am going to heaven because of God's grace. (It's a fairly limited, basic understanding of grace, but) I like to remember that I have God's Riches At Christ's Expense.

I think if I try to write more at the moment I'm going to go around in circles. If you have any thoughts or questions, share them in the comments. I look forward to hearing what you have to say.

Sunday, December 07, 2008

I want this dress


monsoondress
Originally uploaded by debsenglishrose
but since I'm not a millionaire, I have to be content with just showing off pictures of me wearing it!

Thursday, December 04, 2008

Happy Thursday

Hmmm, it seems that having got to the end of November my blogging daily ability faded away. Either that or I've just been really busy.

On Monday I had the kids to look after and I spent the entire morning with Little Flower getting my flat tyre sorted out (Did I tell you I got a flat on the way to church on Sunday). Monday afternoon we just chilled out because it was cold and rainy out. Tuesday I had the kids again and in the afternoon we met up with my friends Danielle and Tracey and watched Aladdin and did colouring and played card and all sorts of fun but random things like that.

Yesterday I spent lots of time tidying my room and getting things done at home, like paying my credit card bill and other such exciting stuff. The Jehovah's Witnesses who've been coming round quite a bit called round and I ended up standing on the doorstep talking to them for over an hour. I was glad well my Mum came to help me, because I was beginning to think I'd never get them to go. I spent the evening with my boyfriend. He cooked me dinner and then we snuggled up and watched CSI. What better way could there be to end a day?!

Today I'm going shopping with Tracey. Well, I am if I can ever get her out of the house (I'm sat using her computer while she gets ready).

Monday, December 01, 2008

I

am a Child of the King.

God is good. I have several blog posts peculating in my head. I'll try to get them out for you all soon!

Sunday, November 30, 2008

The end of November

I can't believe we're almost into December already. In some ways this year has gone sooo fast, and I guess in other ways I can't wait for it to be over.
But anyway, this month I have....

I posted 27 times (including this post). Which isn't quite every day, but is pretty good going I think.

Started dating a lovely guy (and that's all I'm going to say about that!)

Finally got a new car.

Had a flat tyre on new car already.

Had some fun with friends and family.

And lots of other stuff that I'm too tired to say right now! Good night, and goodbye November. Hello December!

Saturday, November 29, 2008

I'm sleepy

But we're still in November, so I had to write something today.
I've gotta go to bed now, but I'll take a pic of my car soon, promise.

Friday, November 28, 2008

New car

I have a new car. Well, new to me. It's a Vauxhall Astra, and it's mine! It had to have the MOT and some work done on it today, but I'm going to pick it up tomorrow, and get the tax sorted out, and I'm sorted!
Thank you to my mummy for putting up with me sharing her car all this time, and to Little One and Little Flower's parents, who are now the ex-owners of the car.

Thursday, November 27, 2008

Thanksgiving Thursday

I am thankful for lots of things...

I'm thankful for my friends and family, who have stood by me this past year, rejoiced with me in my weight loss, loved me and picked me up when I was down, and have generally been amazing (yes, this is going to be one of those soppy posts, so deal with it!)

I'm thankful that I'm part of a great church, where it's all about Jesus.

I'm thankful that I have a chance to share in the formative years for Little One and Little Flower. I love watching them grow and change, and the excitement that the world around them gives them as they learn more about it.

I'm thankful for the kiddo's parents, who are in the process of selling me their second car. (More details to follow when it's all gone through and sorted).

I'm thankful for my blog readers who put up with my ramblings, and even comment occasionally ;)

Wednesday, November 26, 2008

Su

Su is my friend. She's a real-life buddy, but we also spend a lot of time chatting online on facebook. She's a lovely person and always looks out for her friends. I am privileged to know her and have her as my friend :)
(one day I may remember how to spell the word privileged without having to refer to the spellchecker for assistance).

Tuesday, November 25, 2008

I want to celebrate Thanksgiving too

Disclaimer: Although I vowed to write a post yesterday, I never promised to post it. The first two paragraphs of this post were written yesterday, but time restrictions and wanting to expand further meant that I saved it as a draft to work some more on it today.

This week all across America people will be celebrating Thankgiving. Native Americans, Pilgrim Fathers and all that jazz. Ok, so it didn't happen here, but why shouldn't we get to celebrate it anyway?

Although, having been in Texas in time for Thanksgiving last year, and seen the Christmas decorations go up in full force the day after, I'm actually quite glad that we don't have 'The holiday Season' quite as explicitly as they do in the States, and although there are Christmas lights up in Walthamstow market and places like that, it's likely to be a little while longer before they start appearing in/on/outside of people's houses around here.

Anyway, whether or not Thanksgiving is there as a marker to tell Americans when to put up their Christmas decorations, I would like to suggest that being thankful is certainly not a bad idea. I guess in this country schools and Church of England churches would often celebrate Harvest Festival, but since I'm not currently spending much time in either a school or a C of E church, I pretty much missed out on that this year. So instead I'm going to write my own Thankful Post. And since Thursday is Thanksgiving, and there is also the pre-existing bloggy idea of having 'Thankful Thursdays', I'm going to publish that post on Thursday. I invite you to join me, and write a quick post about what you're thankful for this year, where-ever you live.

Sunday, November 23, 2008

I vow

to write a proper post with content and more than one paragraph tomorrow.

Friday, November 21, 2008

I got nothing to say

so I'll say nothing.

Thursday, November 20, 2008

Give Peas a Chance

I'm sorry to follow a picture post with another picture post, but I just have to show you what arrived through my letter box today (let's face it, I'm not really sorry at all, but I have to at least sound a little polite!)
I bought this t-shirt from Cackle on etsy.

Wednesday, November 19, 2008

'prize!

'Prise (surprise/prize) is one of the most used words at the kiddos' house. It can be used as in this context, to say 'boo!', but also in the context of "I went to the toilet by myself, now daddy will bring me home a 'prize".

Tuesday, November 18, 2008

Today

Tracy commented that it's not post something interesting every day, it's just post every day. I guess part of me doesn't want my readers to have to wade through pages of 'sorry, I have nothing interesting to say but I'm going to blog anyway'. After all, I write enough of those type posts as it is, even without managing to post every day.

I think the issue at the moment is finding the balance between baring my soul and having everything out there, and not telling you all anything at all. It's bad enough to figure that out when it's just you and your life that you're referring to, it becomes even trickier when you try to take other people's concerns into account. (Which is a very subtle hint about why I haven't been blogging much recently! Less subtle now that I've pointed it out to y'all)

Life is still plodding along, well in some ways it's galloping, and in others it's a snail's pace or going backwards (yep, that'd be referring to my weight loss, but I'm trying to turn that around!). Actually, you know I haven't done too badly with blogging this month. It's the 17th today, and this is my 16th post of the month, and some of those posts had real content!

Random extra thoughts added at the end, just for kicks:
Did I tell you I did finally buy some new shampoo?
I saw the fox again last night, so it hasn't died of poor health yet. It still doesn't look too good, though.

Monday, November 17, 2008

No time to write a proper post

It seems I'm failing miserably on this blog interesting things every day thing month. However, life is good, I am very happy, God is good. I think those things are sometimes more important than writing a blog post every day. And hey, maybe I'll blog again tomorrow.

Sunday, November 16, 2008

what to blog, what to blog...

so many things to say, so little brain power to write them.
I'm still recovering from my icky cold, and have a pretty impressive cough that's still hanging on. I'm hoping it'll go soon, because it's driving me mad.

This week I plan to actually stay on track with my diet, start job-hunting and car-hunting with a vengeance, get better and have fun. I'll let you know how all that goes...!

Saturday, November 15, 2008

Friday, November 14, 2008

I love you

I started writing this post lying in bed yesterday afternoon and it was really good. Unfortunately there is no wire direct from my brain to my blog, and I was too tired to get up and type it there and then. Given that I'm still feeling pretty icky, I'm not sure how much sense this will make, but I'll try my best. I'm sorry if it just turns out to be sentimental mush. I blame the fact that I'm tired and ill!

Three of my favourite words at the moment are "I love you". They're wonderful to say, and they're wonderful to hear. Before you all start saying, "hey, stop, wait a minute, are we missing something?" let me explain.

One of the things I've been learning this year is to love myself. And I really think that I'm actually beginning to get there. I don't look in the mirror and think I'm ugly, rather I look in the mirror and think "who on earth is that?", but that's another story! I'm more confident about myself and my thoughts and feelings. I'm beginning to find my voice.

Dealing with depression and illness has definitely showed me that there are a lot of people in this world who care about me. People who will go out of their way to tell me and show me that they love me. Having in the past always been better at caring for others than receiving, I've been in the situation that I couldn't do it for myself, I needed to rely for a bit on the support of other people, and I'm so glad that I did. It's shown me again how important friends are and how much I love mine.

So here we come to it, the reason I love to "I love you". I want to tell my friends and family how much I appreciate them. For example, when Little One (the 3 year old I child-mind) tells me that he loves me, I reply "I love you too, Sweetheart", I want him to know that he's important to me, that I valued him, that I like spending time with him. The same goes for my friends and my family, I want them to know for sure that I love them, I don't want them to wonder what I think about them.

I don't know if that makes any sense at all, but that's why I say "I love you". I'm saying it because I value you, you're important to me, I want you to know that I care.

Thursday, November 13, 2008

why going back to bed seems the right thing to do

I have a couple of wonderful blog ideas floating around in my head. And I'm talking proper meaty content. Unfortunately I feel like I'm also floating around the room with the ideas, which is not exactly the best mental state to be blogging in. Therefore, I will go lie down, and leave you with a picture of my feet.

Wednesday, November 12, 2008

Monday, November 10, 2008

A post about nothing

I am exhausted. I have nothing to say, and I haven't uploaded the photos I was going to post, so I will just spend a little time saying nothing at all.
Decent posting will return soon.

Sunday, November 09, 2008

I am actually

alive.
I've just had about 20 minutes online total this whole weekend. Which means I've failed in my plan to blog every day, but it just wasn't physically possible.
I'll try to catch up tomorrow.

(and if you're thinking that it's a little premature me telling you I am alive when I've only been gone from my blog for 2 days, then let me just tell you that I've had 2 people text me to check I was ok cos I hadn't updated my facebook status or been anywhere online since Friday evening!)

Friday, November 07, 2008

Fireworks!

One of the kids at the party playing with a sparkler (and me experimenting with the 'firework' setting on my camera)Me with a sparkler
Fireworks!
Party was fun; great food, pretty fireworks, and I got a sparkler (that made the little kid in me very happy!)

Thursday, November 06, 2008

I am beautiful, in every single way

There've been lots of changes in my life over the last couple of years. Losing weight being one of the most obvious, but there have also been changes in the way I think and the way I see myself.

I know that my mental image of my physical appearance still has some catching up to do. I can see a photo on someone's camera, or (like at church the other day) projected up on the screen at the front, and I still don't recognise that that's me. Maybe one day I will, but in the meantime I get some nice surprises!

Mentally, I'm still adjusting to my changing body shape and to the way that people around me react and interact with me. (Like the guy I know from school who saw my photo on facebook and told me I looked kinda hot!) One of my good friends tells me I'm beautiful and that I should tell myself that daily. Sometimes I believe it, sometimes I don't.

I was just walking home from the post office, dressed in scruffy jeans and the biggest ugliest raincoat you've ever seen, but all of a sudden I just felt beautiful. Life is good. I like being me, I like what I see on the outside, I like who I am on the inside. Heck, I'm blowing my own trumpet, but yeah, I *am* beautiful, and I like it :)

Wednesday, November 05, 2008

I can't fail at the first hurdle

I'm trying vaguely to blog every day this month, except I haven't told you that because I don't want the pressure of having to do it, except I just did tell you... oops.
Well anyway, the problem today is that I have too many things I want to say, and I'm too hyper to say any of them properly.

I have a post I've been thinking about for a while about race, but if I write that today it'll look like I'm jumping on the 'first black President' bandwagon (whereas actually it's been going around in my head for ages).

I could also just give you silly photos, but I did that yesterday yesterday. So that's a bit boring.
Instead I'll just go
bounce bounce bounce
and leave it at that.

Until tomorrow my dear readers.

Tuesday, November 04, 2008

keep on smilin' thru the rain, laughin' at the pain

Little One is slightly confused about the name for a zip. He says "zap me please, Debbie'.

I must always say the same thing to Little Flower when I get her out of the buggy "Would you like to come out?", because now when we wants to get out she says to me "mout! mout!" (rhymes with out)

Monday, November 03, 2008

It's been a busy few days...

On Thursday I met DebbieBoo and Justyna up London and we wandered around lots and saw some really cool stuff. This is Tower Bridge.On Friday I met my friend Sarah in London and we wandered around and had lunch together. In the afternoon/early evening I helped out at our church kids party (alternative to Halloween), and then dropped in to see all the folk who'd dressed up in posh frocks and stuff to go to see the premier of James Bond.

On Saturday evening I met up with a bunch of people and some of us had fun making our own fireworks (guess how I got this shot!) and generally mucking around and having lots of fun!

Sunday, November 02, 2008

Somewhere around the 700 mark

The post counter says that this is my 707th post, however I know that it includes draft posts, and I have several of those sitting around, waiting to either be given a new lease of life and released on the world (like the post I threatened to write all about sex), or to be quietly deleted at some point in the future.

Therefore, I've decided it's time to celebrate this blog getting to 700 posts, whether we're almost there, or actually there, or maybe just over there.
So, happy 700th post.

For your reading pleasure, 7 random facts about me and my blog.

1. I am proud of myself because I have been in possession of a poppy (well, I'm actually on my second one, because I lost the first at Victoria on Friday) for almost a week, and the poppy is still attached to my coat. Which means that I haven't taken it off, removed the bits of paper and started chewing it yet. Yes, I disgusting habit, I know, but to be truthful, that's what's happened to most of the plastic poppies which I have ever owned.

2. I would rather eat fruit cake batter than fruit cake once it's cooked.

3. My blog gets around 50 hits a day. Many of these are through people googling the lyrics from a certain Bugsy Malone song.

4. I have no idea just how many people who know me in person read my blog. All I do know is an awful lot of people have mentioned that they do read it. I have solved the mystery of discovered who my stalker is, and I do know her in person. Hmm, I'm having trouble making this sound like a random fact about me and my blog, but it is a random fact, ok? (How about a de-lurk if you do read my blog, whether you know me in real life or not!)

5. I have almost finished the bottle of shampoo that I hate. This means that when we go grocery shopping tomorrow I need to make doubley sure that I buy some, and pick up shampoo rather than conditioner!

6. I sometimes forget how old I am. It was easy when I was 25 - that's 5 squared, after all. Now I'm 26 I just get confused. I keep thinking I'm 28. Seems like I'm trying to wish my life away!

7. I can't think of a seventh random thing about me (It's all random!) If you know me, how about sharing one about me in the comments...

Saturday, November 01, 2008

Isn't he just adorable?!

This was on our way home from the park. He stopped by the public phone box, picked up the phone and started this beautifully complicated imaginary conversation about going to a party. He's definitely turning into a 'big boy', as he is not remiss to remind me about a hundred times a day.
"Debbie, I'm a big boy, cos I do big boy things, but 'Little Flower' is a baby"

Friday, October 31, 2008

Ok, so here it is...

My little sister, Hannah (aka HP), and her boyfriend, Steve, got engaged on Wednesday. I am very excited :)

Thursday, October 30, 2008

Wednesday, October 29, 2008

I am sooooo excited

But I'm not gonna tell you why, just yet. All in good time, my dears, all in good time!

The blank page mocks me

I have a bit of a love hate relationship with blogging. I'm sure if I actually had a blackberry or something similar that enabled me to remote post to my blog that it would be very different to how it is now. I'm forever writing beautiful posts in my head when I'm on the bus, or in the car, or pretty much anywhere that isn't in front of the computer, but when it comes to sitting down to type them the ideas vanish into thin air. It's like the blank screen is mocking me, daring me to attempt to make sense of my jumbled thoughts, and then I end up writing random ramblings instead.

In some ways, blogging is like therapy for me, it helps me to sort through my thoughts and try to understand them. The problem with that is that I'm discovering more and more people I know in real life are reading me (of course, it doesn't help that my posts are automatically linked to my facebook account, which means over 200 people that I'm friends with on there could potentially be reading). Besides that, there are people from church, university, old school friends and relations who are all reading (even if they don't leave many comments, hint hint). Sometimes it's easier to imagine I'm writing to an audience who don't actually know me in real life, but even then, I'm pretty close to some of my online friends too.

Of course, I'm not saying stop reading me. Not at all! In fact, if you are reading, that's fantastic, it means that my random ramblings possibly aren't so random after all, or else you just love me cos I am random. Either way, that's fantastic. I guess what I'm saying is that a part of me can understand why people do things like send postcards to PostSecret - the release of anonymously sharing without any concern about come back or consequences. Don't get me wrong, I don't have any huge secrets - I'm not an axe murderer or anything like that! I don't really know what I'm trying to say, so I guess I'll just start a new paragraph.

I guess there's a fine line between the public personal stuff and the private personal stuff. I wrote a post the other day about how my session with the counsellor had gone, but it just felt too personal to put it out there in black and white. I guess that's why people choose to blog about 'other stuff', because they don't want their lives to be out there for people to see. I like that this blog is all about me, and reflects me in lots of different moods, but sometimes I look back and think 'why on earth did I write that?!'

Don't get me wrong, if I didn't want to do it, I wouldn't. I guess I'm just saying, don't think that this is ALL there is to my life, there's lots of other stuff going on, but also, thanks for sharing with me in what I do share. Thanks for looking out for me, for asking me how I'm doing, how things went, how I'm feeling today. Sometimes I'll answer in the public setting, sometimes in a more private setting, but I will answer, as best I can.

See, I had no idea I was going to write all THAT when I started writing. I swear sometimes my fingers have a life of their own.

Tuesday, October 28, 2008

SNOW!

It's snowing right now in London. It's not really sticking becauase it rained a lot earlier, but it's still very exciting to me. We don't get snow much in London!

Hurrah for Tess

One of the best things about hanging out on the etsy forums has been making friends with others who hang there too. Although I've never met them (well, apart from blest), I'd still say I have some awesome buddies on there that I care about, and who care for me.

Case in point is Tess, also known as ActivityGrrrl, or AG for short. A couple of weeks back we were discussing candy corn, and I was asking them what it's actually like, since I've never had it. The lovely Tess offered to mail some to me, and the package arrived this morning. Not only did she mail me candy corn, but she also cleverly wrapped it in bags covered in pictures of candy corn. Sheer genius!

I promised to live blog the event, so here goes...

11.02am AG AG AG AG AG! It just arrived! Just a minute ago! I'm so excited :)

11.04am (poses for photo attempting to open parcel)

11.10am (I'm still figuring out how to get into in, but I'll get there eventually...!)

11.12am I'm in! (well, the first layer, anyway!)

11.13am I got the inside layer open and the smell of the sugar hit me straight away!

11.15am (Starts to write blog post)

11.20am (takes photo of packet of candy corn)

11.23am (Opens the packet of candy corn by cutting open the corner with scissors)

11.24am I can smell the sugar really strongly as I pull out my first piece of candy corn. Smelling it I can sense a sort of sugary almost vanilla type smell

11.26am I take a bite from the candy corn and get an immediate sugar hit. The texture feels quite like shop-bought fudge. It offers some resistance at first, and then dissolves slightly on my tongue.

11.27am (eats a second and third candy corn - they were slightly smushed together from transit) They are certainly very sugary, I don't think I could manage to eat more than 2 or 3 at a time.

11.30am (eats a forth and final, for the time being, piece of candy corn and starts to upload photos from camera)

11.47am (gets frustrated with camera not uploading photos and considers eating some more candy corn. Beginnings of a sugar headache suggests this would not be a wise move. Resists)

Considering that 4 pieces were enough for me and my sugar tolerance, and that there are approximately 176 pieces in the packet (based on the stats on the back, suggesting a portion size is 22 pieces, and that there are about 8 servings per container), it's either going to take me a very long time to eat them, or, more likely, I'll be taking my candy corn to share around with my friends whenever I see them this week. Given that a serving of 22 pieces has a calorie count of 140, that's probably not a bad thing!

Thank you so much for mailing them to me, Tess. You're a star :)
(I managed 500 words exactly, Tess!)

Monday, October 27, 2008

Poppy Day

Today I was out and about with the kiddos when we came across a women collecting money for the Royal British Legion. I gave Little One some money to put in the can, and in exchange she gave me a poppy, a sticker for Little Flower, and pinned a poppy to Little One's coat. He was very excited to have the poppy, and also dutifully picked up his sister's sticker every time she dropped it (it pretty much stopped being sticky once an 18 month old got her hands on it).

It wasn't until we were on the bus home that he asked me what the flower was, and why we were wearing them. (If I haven't mentioned already, it's worth noting that he has most certainly reached the 'why' stage of life. Whatever you say to answer the first why, his answer will most probably be 'why?' right back at ya!)

Having not had the chance to talk to his parents about how much detail they want to go into about why we have Remembrance Day, I didn't exactly want to jump in to talking about wars and people dying and stuff like that. After all, he is only three, and I didn't want to confuse or scare him. Instead, I thought about the fact that he is currently a big fan of SUPERMAN! He continually tells me how brave Superman is, or how he's going to be brave 'just like Superman', so I decided that was what to tell him -
"The poppies help us to remember people who were very very brave."
"Just like Superman?"
"Yes, Little One, just like Superman".

Sunday, October 26, 2008

Thursday, October 23, 2008

*hair flick* because I'm worth it

I'm off to see the counsellor. I'm scared stiff, but I know God loves me, and cares for me, and has a good and perfect plan for my life. So I'm gonna keep trusting him, because I'm worth it.
(thanks for the suggestion, Stalker ;) )

In other news, I like my new conditioner. Maybe next time I go shopping I'll manage to remember to buy the shampoo that goes with it.

Wednesday, October 22, 2008

Blast from the past

This was a draft post from February, 2006 that I just dug out.
Yes, that's me in the front row.
We were on a scavenger hunt, and had just given a busker about 10 quid to let us borrow his spot and take our picture!


More questions

I'm going through my blog posts, deleting drafts that are mostly either duplicates or have nothing written in them. This one, however seemed worth publishing, purely for its randomnes. It was originally written on the 4th September 2007


Why does it smell like wee just outside our backdoor? Why doesn't my phone like charging if you turn it off? Why do months have different numbers of days? How do you get rid of squirrels from your back garden so that you can leave the backdoor open without worrying that they will come inside? Come to that, how do you stop the neighbours cat coming inside and scaring you when you come across if unexpectedly? Where is the green parrot?

Why waste time when you can just 'Wash & Go'?

Yep, seems like my head is filled with lines from random shampoo adverts. However, you'll all be please to know, I'm sure, that today, thanks to my blog post yesterday, my Mum reminded me that I needed to buy some more shampoo, and I have duly done so.*

It would also appear that I'm either calmer in general about Thursday, or I'm just ignoring it. Either way, I can tell I'm happy because I'm back to spontaneously bursting into song at the slightest provocation. This might be considered slightly embarrassing when I start singing 'You know you make me wanna SHOUT' whilst picking up stain remover spray in Salisbury's. (Well, it is called Shout, so what d'you expect me to do?). Luckily, I don't embarrass myself too easily, and my mum is pretty used to me (Well she ought to be after knowing me for 26 years, right?)

I love days like today. Those autumn days where the sun is shining and the leaves on the trees are changing colour. Days where you go out and see some people dressed up in jumpers and winter coats, and others wearing just a T-shirt (well not just a t-shirt, but you know what I mean!). It's days like today that remind me I'm British. That sometimes you just can't help but talk about the weather. I mean, just look at the window all you Londoners, isn't it beautiful out there today? And tomorrow will most probably be entirely different. Because that's the way the weather goes around here.

I have an idea brewing for a way to enjoy this time of year in a slightly crazy, but enjoyable way, but I'll let you know what it is once it's more fully developed.

* Actually, it appears I haven't bought shampoo, because I picked up conditioner instead. Oh well. Guess that means I'll have to rack my brains for another line from an old shampoo advert for when I actually do buy some.

Tuesday, October 21, 2008

I'm in love... with a shampoo!

[Seriously, does anyone actually remember that advert? I tried googling, and nothing. How can google let me down like this? I'm sure I have a totally different memory for adverts to the rest of the world. Like the colgate advert with the line about strawberry cheesecake flavour toothpaste and the guy goes 'I like that colgate flavour!']

Anyway, I'm not in love with a shampoo (actually, I hate my shampoo and keep trying to remember to buy some more. The problem is I generally remember when I am in the shower, about to use it, which isn't very helpful), or with my toothpaste, although I am currently happy with my macleans toothpaste.
(Have you ever noticed that some of my blog posts have more asides than actual content?)

I am kinda in love with a blog I just started reading. In love in the sense that the guy who writes it had me captivated after I'd read about 3 posts, and in fits of hysterics before I'd reached the bottom of the first page.

I mean, who wouldn't want the opportunity to discover such random facts as what my height is, measured in width of human hairs or matchsticks...

I discovered that I am as tall as
the width of 36600 human hairs
the width of 950 matchsticks.
the length of 6.16 sheets of A4....

So go ahead, check it out.

Come up and see me, make me smile

Sometimes Little One will suddenly turn to me and say "Debbie".
"Yes, little one?" I'll reply, and he'll smile a me with the biggest grin in the world and say "I love you".
Things like that can make a crappy day much better.

(Day turned slightly downhill when I remembered I have an appointment to see the counsellor at my doctors and started freaking out about it - not knowing what it'll be like, or what to say or anything.)

Saturday, October 18, 2008

View from the roof!


View from the roof!
Originally uploaded by debsenglishrose
This is the fox who was sat outside my backdoor for a couple of hours yesterday afternoon.
This photo was taken from the roof. Yes, I climbed out of my bedroom window and lay on the roof to capture this shot. So don't say I don't do anything for my blog readers!

(This is also my first attempt at blogging from my flickr account, so let's see if it will work!)

WARNING - This post may contain real content

It's come to my attention that although I've promised proper content, and updates on me and all that jazz, I never actually got around to writing them. So here I am. Feel free to switch off and do something less boring instead if you so desire.

Mini recap for anyone who's new around here, or forgotten, or wants a minute to go and put the kettle on before they come back and resume reading a couple of paragraphs down. Hmmm, where shall I start?

Last November I went to Texas to stay with blest and her family for 3 months. A week or so before I came home I had a cold, or so I thought. I arrived back home at the beginning of February, and was pretty much ill for the next 6 months. It was a throat infection, then a chest infection, an ear infection, and then another chest infection. The doctors threw 6 or 7 courses of antibiotics at me, and although I got a bit better some of the time, I always got worse. In, I think, July someone (the consultant I saw at the hospital) finally got the crazy idea that maybe the general antibiotics weren't working, and we should possibly do a test and give me type-specific antibiotics. The test results came back showing that yes, the infection I had was resistant to most of the antibiotics they'd already given me, and suggested something else to try. My doctor put me on those for 2 weeks straight, and they finally did the kick.

That was about a month before we went on holiday to Wales for a fortnight. By the time we went away I was back to being slightly under the weather again, and occasionally still coughing up nasty gunk, but I've kinda got to the point that unless it drags me right down again, I've had enough of going to the doctors! When we got back from holiday we went straight to do a weekend running kids work for a church camp. I managed to sprain my ankle on the very first morning. That was the last weekend in August, and it's still recovering now. I've been having some physio on it (thanks to a private arrangement with a friend of mine!)

I've also been battling depression, and have seen my doctor and talked with people at church. I'm going to be meeting with a counsellor (arranged through my doctor) next week for the first time. I am feeling a lot better - I think actually just talking about it helped me to feel better, somehow, but I'm going to see this counsellor anyway next week, and will see how it goes.

So, yeah, that's a little bit of a recap... so where am I now?
Right now I'm still battling a seemingly constant cold, but it's pretty mild, so I just ignore it. I got back on my treadmill for a couple of sessions this week, and that felt soooo good. I think the fact that you just have to walk meant that I wasn't stopping to think about how I put my foot down, and actually when I got off, my ankle felt better. I'm not up to the speed I was at before, but given I've pretty much had a two month break, I'm sure I'll build up the strength and stamina again. (I'm still not really able to run at all becasue of my ankle, but eventually I'm sure I will!)

Jobwise, I'm still childminding, looking after Little One and Little Flower two days a week, and I jsut started doing some one to one tutoring with a little girl from church. Starting up tutoring again reminded me that I do like children, after all (I was beginning to doubt that!) and my background of working in the education system. Soooo, I'm thinking about focusing on doing that, and hopefully building up a bit of a clientele. I'm also looking into what courses I could do to further my knowledge and give me some more useful qualifications.

Other than that... I've been enjoying the stepped up pace of things in the 20s+ group at church, and especially the chance to get to know some exciting new people :) Oh, and I'm still feeling pretty hyper today ;)

Friday, October 17, 2008

Possibily slightly hyper today

Me, I am.
Gotta dash. Catch you later.

Thursday, October 16, 2008

Wednesday, October 15, 2008

Snuggles and Tears

A certain young lady was pulling his hair just before the photo was taken (The camera was on timer!)

Tuesday, October 14, 2008

Monday, October 13, 2008

Monday Monday, so good to me. Perhaps

Um, hello. My name's Debs, and this is my blog. I think. It's been a little while since I devoted it proper attention. It was a busy weekend, and before that, well, I don't really have a good excuse, except perhaps writers block.

Today is my sister Bekki's birthday. You can go and wish her a happy birthday if you want to, but please come back. I'll try to be interesting.

You back? Good. Well as I said before, the weekend was very busy. On Saturday my parents and I went up to Cambridge to visit Bekki and take her out to lunch. It was a beautiful day, and we had a lovely time. In the evening I went out for a meal to a Greek restaurant for a friend's birthday, and totally shot the diet plans to bits by eating moussaka. It was yummy though :)

On Sunday I went to church, and Adrian was preaching from the third chapter of Nehemiah. My church is doing a series from that book of the bible at the moment. After church I went with a whole bunch of people (the 20s+ group from church) for lunch and an afternoon of fun and laughter around someone's house. I took lots of funny photos, but since I couldn't get my camera and computer to talk to each other last night, I can't share any of them yet!

Today I'm looking after the kiddos, and hoping that the day might get sunnier. I think we'll go on leaf walk later and find some of the beautifully coloured leaves which have fallen off the trees in the last few days. All of a sudden it's clear that Autumn is certainly here.

Saturday, October 11, 2008

Busy Busy Busy

Today we're off to Cambridge to have lunch with Bekki to celebrate her birthday (which is actually on Monday). Then this evening I'm going out for another meal to celebrate the birthday of a friend of mine. Tomorrow is church, and then out to lunch with the other 20s+ group.
At some point I'll try to bring you up to date and show you some photos too...

This was me on Thursday.

Friday, October 10, 2008

I might post

soon... I might not. We shall see.
Just thought I'd let you knowI'm still alive.

Tuesday, October 07, 2008

wake up sleepy head

I don't know why, but this afternoon I was suddenly hit by the tiredness truck, and I can hardly stay awake. I thought about having a nap this afternoon, but decided not to turn down the opportunity to go grocery shopping with my mum. I love my mum, and I love grocery shopping, so it seemed too good an oportunity to miss ;)

This evening I was originally going to be babysitting for some friends, but they've had to cancel their plans, so instead I'll be heading over to Leyton in a little while to meet some friends, and hopefully have some physio on my ankle, which has been really achey for the last couple of days.
Besides, they won't mind too much if I just fall asleep on their sofa!

I'm hoping to write a proper post soon, updating you all on my life and other such exciting things, maybe tomorrow if I have enough brain power!

Saturday, October 04, 2008

2 Year Anniversary

Thursday, 2nd October marked the two year anniversary of my weight loss journey. I weighed in at 211.2, which is 82.8lb lower than my starting weight.
Although that wasn't the lowest I've got over the two years, I am unbelievably happy about the changes in ME that have happened over the last 2 years. (I got down to 203/204 a few weeks back, but a sprained ankle which has put a hold to exercise, and some comfort eating meant I put some weight back on).

I am a different person. For a start, people that didn't know me two years ago would possibly not be able to recognise me from photos taken back then. Physically I am a lot stronger and fitter. Ok, so that might sound funny coming from the person who's spent much of the last 8 or 10 months on antibiotics and other assorted drugs, and visiting the doctors. But I hate to think how this infection would have affected me if I'd had it two years ago.

I am actually happy being me. I like what I see when I look in the mirror. I'm not at my goal yet, but I can see that it is possible, it can be achieved. Here's to the next year, and maybe even reaching goal (approx another 40lb, depending on how I feel when I get there!)

April 2006 (sorry, couldn't find a good face on pic)July 2006 (at a wedding, with my sister, HP)
July 2008 (at a wedding, with my sister, HP)August 2008I love being me :)

Thursday, October 02, 2008

I live in London

but not a bit that tourist would want to see. Or so the total lack of postcards being sold down Walthamstow shops and market seems to suggest. Which begs the question why you can buy London postcards in places like Cambridge, or even Palmers Green ;), but not here in Walthamstow.
I guess I'll just keep looking
(I'm doing a postcard exchange with people on etsy. If any of my readers wants to do a postcard swap, leave me a comment to let me know, and we'll sort it out)

Wednesday, October 01, 2008

The circle of life

When I was little we used to have a rotary phone (the type where you turn the dial around to dial each number). I believe it was green. Anyway, along with the numbers it also had letters assigned to each number.

This was a throwback to when instead of having area codes that were numbers, they'd have an area code made up of letters. You'd dial the letters of the town the phone number was located, and then the rest of the phone number. Later, the letters were replaced with the numbers, and phone numbers began to look more like they do today. (So my phone number for London began 08, which is odd, because the L isn't on the 8 key, but London has to do things differently!)

Anyway, when I was little, we were past the stage that the letters were being used, and I used to look at my phone and wonder why on earth they would bother even putting the letters on there anymore.

Today, as I was texting HP, I realised how fast things things have changed. In the past 20 odd years, telephones have been redefined. People definitely use the letters on phone keypads once again. The circle is complete.

As an extra aside, I often wonder what small children today make of toy rotary phones. We have one, and I know that that Fisher Price telephone is a common toy at playgroups and mum&tots groups, and yet in reality hardly anyone has a rotary telephone anymore.

Monday, September 29, 2008

That Friday Feeling

Except it's now Monday. But I'll use the title anyway.
Last night I wrote a list of things I want to achieve this week. I'm not going to put too much pressure on myself to achieve everything on the list (some of the goals are slightly more long term). But it's a start, and gives me something to plan towards.

I kinda hurt my ankle again a bit yesterday at church - climbing over a barrier, I landed on it funny. Hopefully it'll settle down again soon. I'm trying to still do the exercises that my friend who's a physio therapist suggested. (He gave my ankle some manipulation last Tuesday, and it really felt better for a few days)

I'm going to try to stay on track with my eating again this week. It got a bit out of hand last week, and I really don't want the weight to start to creep back on.

Saturday, September 27, 2008

Tagged!

I've been tagged by Ladybuggz to share 7 facts about myself that not everyone knows. This may be tricky as a wide variety of people read my blog - some only know me online, and others know me very well in person, but here goes...

1. On both feet, my second toes are actually longer than my big toes.

2. I am the most accident prone person I know, but I've never broken a bone.

3. I don't eat fish. Even the smell of it can make me feel sick.

4. I currently have 8 blogs and 5 email addresses. I'm thinking I need to cut down a bit..

5. I cannot stand wearing itchy clothes, so that pretty much includes anything made from wool.

6. I grind my teeth in my sleep, and talk, and sometimes sleepwalk. Trust me, you don't want to share a room with me.

7. I'm still in my pyjamas, and it's after midday.

I tag anyone who wants to be tagged. If you do it, come back and leave me a link in the comments.

Wednesday, September 24, 2008

Tuesday, September 23, 2008

Hair shots...

This is the best 'before' shot I can find right now.
After - Front view
Back view

Happy day

Yesterday I had the happiest day I've had in a long time. Somehow things all came together, and it just felt good. I was enjoying doing things and I was enjoying being alive. I decided in advance that I wanted to 'achieve' getting a hair cut and buying a diary (day planner), and I did :)

I like my new haircut, and hopefully I'll be able to get it to do the things the lady in the shop got it to do when she blow dried it. Dont get me wrong, I have no intention to spend 20 minutes on my hair every day, but I might manage five, tops!

In the afternoon I did some cooking. I made homemade baked beans and an apple&blackberry crumble. I haven't really cooked much in a long time, and it felt good to me cooking again.

And in the evening I got to spend some time chatting with friends online. It all made a great day :)

Saturday, September 20, 2008

I am wiped out

I guess a sickness bug and fever, followed by a couple of days packed with excitement can really wear a girl out. I'm exhausted. I'm about to go take a nap.
I'll try to catch up with blogging later or tomorrow.

Friday, September 19, 2008

DebbieBoo goes to Cambridge

I took DebbieBoo to Cambridge, and we met Bekki and went into town.
Here we are in the carpark lift (I saw the mirror and thought, hey, a way to take a photo of all three of us at once!)DebbieBoo and Bekki on a bridge over the Cam

Just after eating lunch.