Wednesday, May 14, 2008

I'm a survivor, I'm gonna make it

It's amazing the range of different emotions a person can feel in one day. Today I think I've felt everything, almost.

Happiness, when I got off the treadmill after my first work out in over a week.

Annoyance, when I realised the chili con carne that was supposed to have been cooking nicely in the crock pot for the past 5 hours, actually wasn't cooking, cos I hadn't turned the switch on at the wall.

Worry - this morning I had this real sense of foreboding in the pit of my stomach, it was almost making me feel physically sick, and I couldn't even put my finger on why I was feeling like that.

Sadness, when I stopped to wonder if I will ever stop feeling ill and down, and be back to my usual happy self.

Pain - when I woke up this morning I had pain in my back, about where my lungs are. It didn't last too long, and I was feeling lots better by the time I got on my treadmill (and I do listen to my body, and wouldn't have got on it if I didn't think I was ok to do so).

Hope - I know that things won't be like this forever, they will get better. I just have to keep plodding, and see how it goes.

I'm a survivor, I'm gonna make it. Even if everything seems to have crumbled right now, I'll take it one brick at a time and start re-building.

No comments: