Friday, June 13, 2008


It's 1.45pm, and I've been up for just over 2 hours. Before you all start exclaiming about that, I only stayed in bed until 11.30am cos I didn't actually get to sleep until 4am. In the last couple of hours I feel like I've felt up and down and good and bad, and all sorts of different things, but now I just feel sore and in pain, and fragile, and like I'm about to cry.

The alternative anti-inflammatory drugs I've been taking have now been officially added to the "I am allergic to this drug" list. They've made me wheezy, coughy, swollen and sore, and also apparently put on a stone (14lb) in the space of a few days. I haven't taken them since Wednesday evening, and a couple of pounds have come off again, so hopefully it's not a long-term weight gain.

I'm just fed up of being ill. Fed up of not knowing how I'm gonna feel tomorrow. I've almost given up hope that there will be a day that I'll wake up and be better. For a couple of days the meds actually gave me relief from pain, and I actually thought things were looking up. Then my body realised what I was taking, and rebelled, and now I'm left struggling with breathing, and in worse pain that I was in before. I just can't take being ill anymore. It's too hard.

I tried to get an appointment to see my doctor, or any doctor today, but even though I begger they weren't having any of it. Now my friend Rach has suggested I take myself off to A&E instead. I'm wating for another 20mins before my mum gets off work, so i can ring her and see what she thinks. Cos I can't even make that decision for myself right now.

UPDATED UPDATE: My Mum is on her way home, and then we're heading to the hospital. She told me to ring the docs again, and see if there was any chance I could speak to a doctor on the phone. The receptionist I spoke to was lovely, and basically said that given what you've told me, I'd rather you do to the hospital and get seen to where they've got the good drugs ;-) than faff around here waiting for a doctor to call you, who probably won't be able to do anything anyway.

1 comment:

Krazy Kate Designs said...

Debs, praying that one day you will wake up and feel wonderful. And that you'll sleep great.